It’s okay to not be okay.

We can make parenthood out to be as glitz and glam as we want on social media and to our non mum friends but we are actually making it harder for ourselves and future mums.

We need to make not being okay acceptable because it is, it’s perfectly fine to have a day when you are not ok and things are really tough.

I wish it was it was as acceptable to say I’ve had the shittest day ever and get everything off my chest as it is to boast about all the good things my baby/child has done.

I feel that not being ok is a taboo subject, around the topic casts judgments of “is she fit to be a mother?” “is she depressed?” “does she need help?” Neither of these is a true statement because I’m a perfectly good mum but today I’m having a bad day and playing mum is draining.

Some will relate some won’t but I am now a single parent, my little boys dad has him a weekend here and there which makes me sometimes feel he gets all the good parts.

The fun days out, gets to go to work with full energy and no disturbed sleep and I resent him for it, right or wrong for feeling that way I don’t care because it’s how I feel and I’m not ashamed of that.

Today I had a bad day, cleaning the house made me cry, putting reg to bed made me cry, didn’t make myself food because I just couldn’t be bothered and even turning the tv over felt like climbing Mount Everest.

I felt guilty, hurt and felt so lost.

What I realised is all of the above clarifies something! I am human..

I am aloud to have bad days and so are you.

These bad days don’t define us, they make us better parents.

Dont try to avoid your bad days embrace them because you need to let all that inner emotion go, don’t bottle it up. If you need to cry then cry, it’s ok this is not forever.

You are not superhuman and able to face everything with a smile because that’s not how life works unfortunately.

I can’t promise you won’t have lots of days like this but I can promise you the better days will our weigh them.

I am not saying we need to moan about our kids over social media but be as positive as you can about it.

I posted a photo to say, here I am, I am a mother and today I am having a bad day because you know what?! It’s temporary, it’s not forever and I am perfectly fine for being emotional because I am human.

We need to show the world it’s ok not to be ok, it’s really that simple.

I sometimes look at some people’s life on social media and think Jesus I want my life to be like that but then I realise behind those 300 happy posts is probably a unhappy girls with her own problems, it’s okay though she’s human but I can’t help but think there are people wishing for her social media life when really we only want people to see the good bits.

Now, I know that we don’t need to show every time we have a bad day but we need to see more realistic stuff.

I am about to travel south east Asia with my son who’s 2 and I can’t wait to share the highs and lows with you because it’s going to be the best challenging experience ever and I want people to see the real side to it.

The world would be a better place if people didn’t feel the need to be ashamed of not being ok, I am going to open up my DM on Instagram confidentially.

If you need to speak to someone, I am here. If you need to rant, I am here.

Dont be alone, don’t be ashamed and certainly be proud of that bad day it won’t define you.

You are amazing, you are strong and you will get through this.

Alone or not, together we stand as parents to never let anyone feel alone again.

(Instagram – chelsandreg)

feel free to message me x

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10 flying with a toddler tips.

 

1: Remember to take milk on board with you, they don’t serve any form of milk other then sachets on board. You are able to take liquids through for a baby, they will just get tested.

2: Make sure you have a tablet loaded with multiple programmes and films. Even though long haul flights have the screens built in, you’ll find your toddler will find it easier with a tablet and can play it out loud if they don’t like head phones.

3: Make sure you are loaded with lots of snacks they like, they may get a meal on board but you may find they may go off big portions of food when flying.

4: Be prepared with take off, it could hurt their little ears. A good way to avoid this is to get your baby to have a bottle on take off and landing or get them to have a small snack.

5: Have calpol sachets at the ready, flying could cause them to feel a little unwell and we all know calpol is a god send at the best of times.

6:Make sure they fly comfy, and have spare lighter clothes as it could get warm on the plane. Also be prepared for cold so maybe ensure you have a blanket for them.

7:Small toys are a good thing to have, my son loved playing with his mini figures and small cars on the small table.

8:If you are flying long haul try and get at least one of your family to get extra leg room seats, the baby can then sit on the floor and play (this is essential for long haul)

9: Try and keep calm, babies sense any sort of tension. If he starts crying don’t worry, the more you stress the more he will stress. Take the baby for a walk and maybe just explore the plane. Staff on board will usually help where possible!

10: Have fun, embrace every moment whether this be the first or 10th time flying! It’s an exiting adventure! Get talking to them about it before, show them planes on YouTube and point them in the sky. It will add that extra excitement to the journey!
Happy flying ✈️

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Epoch Infant Hibiscus Hair and body wash – Review.

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(Above is result after using the products regularly and consistently)

I will start off with the full details of this product then go into detail of my review.

It is sold by Nuskin and various distributors amongst the company, this is my first product review of theirs.

Indigenous mums and dads have actually long made use of special flowers and also plants to cleanse their babies. Epoch Infant Hibiscus Hair and also Body Laundry contains hibiscus blossom extracts, made use of by standard cultures in Southeast Asia as well as Central The U.S.A. in order to help moisturise as well as preserve a healthy and balanced scalp while cleansing the skin and also hair.

Now you could use treasures of wisdom passed down by generations of mums and dads from the far reaches of the world to offer your infant the most effective care feasible.

Epoch Child Hibiscus Hair as well as Body Clean is in a lovely 150ml bottle which is easy to use.

You are able to dispense into one hand making it easy to use on your baby,  you only use 1 or 2 pumps so this actually lasts a long time. I believe it will last a few months before we need to replace it.

This product is specialist to help with the following:

– Dry skin

– Eczema

– Cradle cap

– Rashes

– Psoriasis

This doesn’t actually just work for infants but for adults too!

A spontanous try of it for my own use actually showed a huge improvement on my dry skin which was amazing!

It can take time to start to see huge improvements but I saw a difference after the 3rd wash.

I wish this product was around when my son had cradle cap as my investigation and research on the reviews has proven this product is incredible for it!

Obviously it won’t completely magic it all away but with regular and consistent use the results are amazing.

Products from the Drs and other brands have not even touched the dry skin and sores previously but it’s so great to have found something that works.

In regards to value for money it’s fantastic for the quality of the product, like they say you pay for quality and it it was ridiculously cheap you start to ask questions but I believe the price is more then reasonable.

You can order this product for just £18.25 plus postage (contact chelsearubyr@icloud.com for more information)

Something that really sells it for me is how a product is made and tested and if your like me I like to know what I’m putting on my skin and even more so if I’m putting it on my son!

It is made together with some natural ingredients like, Avena Sativa Kernel Extract, Sambucus Nigra Fruit Juice, Calendula Officinalis Flower Extract, Hibiscus Rosa-Sinensis Flower Extract and Nu Skin advocates and subscribes to both the ethical and humane treatment of animals and the protection of human health and safety, Nu Skin does not test its cosmetic products on animals, nor do they request others to test on their behalf.

When it comes to the company’s nutritional products, Nu Skin adheres to the same philosophy.

After doing some research NUSkin have been praised countlessly for their natural ingredients and for how well they test their products which is great to know.

I rate this product 9/10 and would recommend this to friends and family.

I look forward to trying their other products in the future and to continue to see results and the publics results with this one.

 

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Did anyone ever mention parents matter too?

We all forget this the minute our children are born. The minute that tiny baby is in your arms you become selfless and every single one of your dreams and priorities change.

The only thing that matters is that baby. However, we get so caught up in our child’s needs and wants and we neglect ourselves. Our body, our wardrobe and mainly our social life.

Being a 24/7 devoted parent is hard work but we all need to cut ourselves some slack sometimes.

Its ok to go out with your friends, you need it. You will end up losing your self and let being a mum completely take over your life and energy.

People are so judgmental on parents who go out, buy things for themselves or parents that have social lives after having children. I understand people make the choice to not go out and to give every ounce of their time and money to their kids which is amazing and those children are lucky to have such devoted parents but just because I like to indulge in wine with my friends or I like to go treat myself to a new hand bag does not mean I am not just as devoted. I believe it is healthy to have a life after having a baby.

Just because you have a child it does not mean your life should stop, if anything it has only just begun. You need rest bite and you need that time to yourself to recharge your batteries.

I feel a better parent after I have had time to myself, I love missing him it makes my love for him grow.

If you want to go on holiday without your child, do it. If you want to go on a weekend away with the girls, do it. If you want to spend the night in with your children, do it. As long as a child is safe and looked after by someone you trust who’s to say you can’t get a break.

I notice women going out every other weekend; the first thing people think is “How dare she leave her child all the time. How can you she go out a waste money on drink and not on her kid” as long as that child has all it needs and for all you know could be with a grand parent or father, who are we to judge? The only time we should be concerned is if a child looks and is neglected and just because a parent goes out does not mean they are neglecting their child.

We are aloud to have fun as well, we look after our demanding children 24 hours a day 7 days a week and YOU DESERVE the break. Its healthy to spend time away from your child, absence makes the heart grow fonder (in moderation of course) I strongly believe that.

All a child needs is love, clean clothes, roof over their head and food on the table. If a child is getting that then no one has a right to judge.

People are worried to go out, spend money on them or get that break because they don’t want to be judged. All I can say is fuck them and their stupid opinion because every parent deserves a break.

You spend 99.9% of your time worrying and caring for you child, you deserve that break and don’t let anyone tell or make you feel like you don’t.

Keep doing you ❤️

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